Off facebook and on Neptune

Laura aural says thank you for understanding.

Laura aural has almost banished the February curse.

Laura aural feels almost like a better version of her old self.

Laura aural had one of the best weekends of her life. She took it back. Thank you, my love.

Laura aural spent some time reading old notebooks tonight. Winter of 2005. Yesterday and a life time ago. I now have everything I never thought I would have. That meaning I so desperately searched for has been found. The love I ached for. The love I longed to give is now given.

Laura aural is having a perfect weekend.

chris wrote on my Facebook wall: "we own this day now and forever." So true. My own day of horrid that I fought so hard to shake off lay at my feet after a trip to the mall. February 15 will now be the day that I looked at engagement rings with the man I love. The symbolism is too obvious to point out. I can't explain that much of my crying is from an abundance of love and an inability to process it at the speed at hitch it is received. I need to be the same for him. Maybe when you share the horrid with the right person, they can help make it ok, maybe even beautiful.

I am pissed off. He does not get to post pictures of roses with a happy valentine's day exclamation mark all caps on my facebook wall. For years I longed for him to acknowledge the cheesy holiday. To take the initiative and be a normal boyfriend. Not once. Ever did he do that. He does not get to do that now - not in jest, not in friendship, not in  anything. Ever.    I am too mad at myself to even see straight any time I even think about how many years of my life I wasted, threw away, sullied on him. How much emotional anguish I allowed myself to feel because of him.What it did to my self worth. All those thoughts wasted on someone so undeserving. He had no idea.    Pause in the rant to acknowledge that Chris is my everything. I am glad I waited almost 36 years for him. He is better than anything and anyone I ever could have imagined. The last year has been like a dream come true. I am living my own happily ever after.      J. never ever made me feel that was my life. He never

Laura aural says, "fuck you February. I'm happy and loved and none of your shit can hurt me any more."

Laura Arual had a cranky homecoming, but she vows to do better tomorrow.

Laura Arual enjoys a kind of boring night at home with her favourite person.

Laura Arual is well into February and she doesn't care. Life is good.

Laura Arual lost an important reflection today due to an improper save. Its gist? Show gratitude by not worrying. Relax, enjoy what you have been given. Just love him.

Laura Arual is sorry for being snappy this morning.

Laura Arual fights the winter blackness with everything she has.